Letting go

In my previous blog, I talk about how you never get over someone that you truly love. I am such a firm believer in this. I honestly don't think that you can. At least for me, once someone is in my heart, they stay there forever. You simply learn to move on and live without them.

If I had to count, I'd say I had about three serious relationships in my entire life. Ranging from one to three years. If you asked me right now if I loved them, I'd probably tell you yes. Would I date them again? Absolutely not. Do I wish anything negative upon them? Most definitely not. They helped shape me into the young woman that I am today, and I adore them for that. From every guy that I've dated or "talked" to, I've learned something new about myself and what I want in a relationship. Letting go is never easy... not if you truly loved someone. How do you let go of someone?

In my book, step one would be knowing your worth.Go look up Psalm 139:14. When my last boyfriend broke up with me, I would think "I am more beautiful than Cinderella. I smell like pine needles and have a face like sunshine." (If you don't know that quote then I need you to stop reading and go watch Bridesmaids right now. I'm not kidding. Go.)  Instead of thinking, "I'm so sad that I lost him," think "it's totally his lost because I am the BOMB DOT COM." Be confident in yourself. Know that you're a good person with a kind heart. Know that you are beautiful, inside and out. Know that God made you perfect. You. Are. Perfect.

Were you cheated on? I've been there. Multiple times. If you dwell in thinking that you're worthless and constantly questioning what other girls have that you don't have, you'll never be happy.  Instead of thinking what THEY have, think about what YOU have. Know your worth, ladies. It's hard. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with but with lots of praying, I've reached a point where I understand what I have to offer someone and it's made my life ten times better.

Step Two: 
Be positive about the future. It's easy to focus on the boys that broke your heart, but like I tweet all the time, try focusing on how exciting it's going to be when God finally sends someone your way who will give you his all. If you continue to stay in a negative state of mind, you won't be able to open your heart and accept new love. Life is all about experiences, some negative others positive. Don't dwell on the things that hurt you. Look at it this way, if you didn't get hurt every once in a while would you be the strong person that you are today? Take it as a life lesson learned and move on. Definitely easier said than done but not impossible. Pray. When the weight of the world gets too heavy, get down on your knees and pray.


Times like this it is easy to question God. I know that whenever I would get broken up with, I would ask God why this was happening. That's just me being real. Back to the bible verse that I wrote about in the last blog post, Jeremiah 29:11. Whatever is happening is happening for a reason. You might no understand it, but you don't really have to. God's got it. He knows the endings and will lead you to it. Remember, every broken heart is putting you one step closer to the one that God has waiting for you.


Step Three: 
Stay busy. Stay open. After every break up, even when I've been the one to break up with boys, sometimes all I want to do is lay in my bed and cry. Luckily, I have been blessed with amazing friends and sorority sisters who will not let me do dwell for too long. They give me a few days to myself but then force me to not stay at my apartment by myself. If you haven't already, go follow @A_Southern_Lady on twitter. She was the best support system I could have asked for with my last break up with a boy named Nick. When she would either see tweets about me doing nothing or I would tell her I'm doing nothing, she would give me different things to go do. She would tell me to go shopping or to go out to eat or anything. After a while, I realized this is just what I HAVE to do. When Prince William and Kate Middleton broke up, she only gave herself a little while to dwell. She pretty quickly began going out and having fun. This was the best way to show him that she was fine without him. You know what happened after? He wanted her back and now they're going to have the prettiest baby ever. But maybe you'll do the same and he won't want you back. That's okay because the more you're out of your house, apartment, etc. the more opportunity you'll have to meet new boys. If a boy is interested in you, give him a chance. I'm not talking about a day or week after your break up... definitely give yourself time to dwell. But if a cute guy who seems genuinely nice asks for for your number then give it to him. If you don't find him interesting after a little bit then onto the next one.

Keep your mind, options, and heart open. Stay positive. And above all, pray and trust God. You're beautiful, wonderful, and perfect. It's only a matter of time before a guy comes along who realizes all of that and will cherish you for everything that you are. 

Love, M.
Thanks for reading this! Once again, this is JUST for me. It's not everything I do to let go of a guy just the three main things that I do. Feel free to leave a comment about one of your steps. I'd love to hear it!