Let Go and Let God

I had a pow pow with my boss and a co-worker today and in the middle of it, God spoke to me so here I am, with tears in my eyes, typing this.

I have preached and preached about trusting God when it comes to love but I have never you told you about the struggles that I had to deal with and fight through in order to keep my faith strong and keep believing in love. Growing up, my parents were always great. I'm not going to say that my childhood was perfect but I pretty much never saw my parents fighting over anything major. The trouble began when I was a teenager. Parents are supposed to be the prime example for their children when it comes to true love. They are supposed to teach their children that true love exists and to show them how beautiful love is when God brings two people together. Just like you are supposed to be faithful to God, you're always supposed to be faithful to your partner. My dad seemed to forget this for a while... Needless to say, my father has had multiple affairs on my mom. As the youngest and only daughter, I looked up to my dad like he was superman so how was I supposed to feel? I could not believe that my superman turned into the villain. 

I was so hurt. I was also SO mad at God. How could He do this to my family? How could He do this to me? How could He take a perfectly healthy family and put them in this scenario where they are all hurting so bad?  I would pray so hard that my family would be fixed and that nothing would hurt my mother like that again. I would pray that I could trust men again. 

I continued to pray and to go to church for a long time, and God continued to speak to me but for some reason, I just couldn't accept it in my heart. He would tell me that everything would be okay, to have faith in Him, to trust Him but I would continue to be so skeptical. After 2 more affairs, almost a divorce, and being cheated on myself, something in me just... clicked.  I just remember that one day I was in my apartment listening to Elevation worship music then all of a sudden I just felt overcome with God's love. I fell to my knees and just trusted Him that everything would really be okay. I realized that there was a difference between saying that I trusted God and actually handing myself over to Him and saying "whatever You're doing, You're doing it for a reason. You've got my best interest in mind." 

Slowly but surely, I began to see the world through different eyes. I began to realize that there were still good guys in the world - men who don't cheat, who don't lie, who can actually love you and only you. I finally trusted God with every fiber in my body. I began to pray for my future husband and that God would mold me into the woman that my future husband needed and deserved. I prayed that He helped me remain patient while He prepared us for each other. 

.... And then I met Wesley. This man is the most romantic, faithful, and handsome man that I have ever met. I fell for him hard, and I fell for him fast. I wouldn't change that for the world. I knew from the beginning that this is the man that I am meant to be with for the rest of my life. I am thankful that I went through everything that I did because at the end of the day, I would not appreciate this man the way that he deserves. The wait and journey was not fun, but it was worth it. 

So in conclusion, you may have to go through some really rough things but that should not stop you from realizing that God has your best interest in mind. People used to tell me that God never gives you more than He knows you can handle. Well, I think that He does. He wants you to realize that when you can't handle it anymore, He'll be there for you. You just have to trust Him. 

Ahh.. If you actually made it this far in the post, I applaud you. I hope that I have inspired you or given you hope. I hope you realize that just because one man did you wrong, it does not mean that every man will. God loves you. He wants what's best for you. Trust Him.

Love, M. 

“...You say to God, “I have never seen you provide for me.” 

God says to you, “You have never trusted Me.” 

― Corallie Buchanan, Watch Out! Godly Women on the Loose

The In Between

So M texted me today asking if I would write a blog. As many of you know, I have only written one blog on here before because quite frankly I don't think I can write and I really never have anything important that I think y'all would actually want to read. But here recently I've started to realize that maybe my life is more relatable than I think it is. Y'all know that M is in a relationship and extremely happy with him (YAY!) but my love life is rather lackluster. Guys come into my life just as quickly as they run away. I get the "Oh you're so great that the idea of being with you scares me." card all the time. It's seriously so annoying. It has made me be very standoff-ish towards relationships and anything involving them. I push people away, I don't allow them to get too close because hey what's the point? They won't stick around long anyway. But when M asked me to blog today I knew exactly what this blog should be about. The in between stage with a guy, where you're not exactly sure where you stand with him.

Disclaimer: I'm writing this with the hopes that the guy I'm going to be writing about doesn't read this. So fingers crossed for that.

SO before this gets going, you need a little bit of background to speed you up to where we are today. I transferred schools this semester, I'm a fourth year biology major and I recently joined a sorority (Go Gamma Phi!) So obviously being at a new school I had to meet new people and make new friends. My sorority really helped me with that thank goodness. And being newly single at this school it was also a whole new playing field for the guys. I met a guy, and at the beginning it was nothing but harmless flirting. But then I quickly started questioning if there was something more. I mean on my end I knew that there could be for me, but who knows what goes through a man's head nowadays. We had our ups and downs and plenty of fights over the silliest things which ultimately ended up in us not speaking for roughly three weeks. One night while I was actually at M's apartment he texted me and I just put everything out on the table. Mind you, I'm not one to beat around the bush when it comes to feelings and what not, I'm too old to play that game. Things got better between us and we both apologized for the things we had done and that night to prove to him that I still cared about him we ended up hanging out for hours and talking. Everything went back to normal where we were seeing each other on a daily basis and hanging out and talking all the time. He ended up asking me to his fraternities semi formal (I tweeted a picture about that, it was super cute) and obviously I'm stressing about a dress and all that. But every time we hang out I just can't help but wonder, is there more on his end that I don't know about. I mean with the way things in the past have been with us, I'm just taking it day by day to see where things go but it's driving me NUTS. I just want to know…

I'm sure I'm not the only one stuck in the in between of not knowing. Clearly something is there but I guess patience really is a virtue and if you know anything about me, I do not possess it. I mean seriously girls, why are guys so freaking difficult? It's really not that hard of a concept to just be like "Oh hey. Your face, yeah I like that!" and then all they have to do is be like "Yeah me too! It's pretty." Geez guys, get your stuff together and just man up.

I guess maybe I should wrap this up, cause its pretty long. Who knows, maybe he will read it and do something, or maybe the guy that you are in the in between with will read this because you "forgot" you left it pulled up on the computer for him to see and he will make a move. A girl can wish, right?

Much love,
H

The Ultimate Christmas Guide: Chubbies

Hey ladies,

We've had so many of y'all ask us about different ideas for Christmas presents so I'm going to make it real easy for y'all. I'm not a HUGE fan of getting guys clothes for Christmas but sometimes it's an easy route to take. It's not uncommon knowledge that both girls who run the account are both obsessed with Chubbies because they pretty much has the perfect shorts for ANY guy. I'm currently in LOVE with their Sport Utility Shorts. They're pretty much perfect for any guy who loves nature or being attractive. 

My personal favorites are the Smokies. I recently got these in the mail and I can honestly say that I'm obsessed with them. These are so perfect. They're 100% cotton with deep pockets in the front and back, and are just so stinkin' sexy. 

The second best thing is that they come in a box that you can just wrap right away and place right under the tree. This way they stay out of sight of curious eyes! 

I'll be posting more ideas soon! I'm just waiting for more things to come in since I ordered them kind of late but I had to post this ASAP! 

SKIES OUT, THIGHS OUT. 

Love, M. 

Sometimes the hardest person to love is yourself.

I spent all day contemplating what I wanted to write about tonight. I honestly had no idea until I opened up our ask.fm account to see if we had any questions. I don't know if you know this but we occasionally have guys ask us for advice. Tonight a guy sent us a 'question' - it was actually more of a statement - but it said, "I'm unsure as to whether or not I am good enough for her."

I began to think about how so many people think that they might not be good enough - especially for the guy or girl that they truly have feelings for. Well, I'm here to say that YOU. ARE. GOOD. ENOUGH. It literally breaks my heart when y'all tell us that you don't feel good about yourselves. I'm not going to sit here and pretend like I've been completely happy with myself my entire life. So what did I do to feel better about myself?

I made a change. I knew what I'm wasn't happy about - my weight. After sitting around moping about how I was so unhappy with myself, I decided to make a change. I worked out and ate healthier. After a while, I saw results and was extremely happy. On another note, I went through a phase where I suffered from mild depression. I was a pessimist and looked at everything from a negative point of view. I don't know what happened but one day something just clicked for me. When I realized that I was thinking of something in the "glass half empty" perspective, I would try to tell myself that it was going to be okay and that it would all work out. That was the hardest thing I ever had to do. 

If you are constantly working to better yourself - whether it be to get to a healthier weight or to live with a positive attitude - you are constantly making yourself feel better. Don't do it for a guy... do it for you. The right man will love you no matter what. Do it so that you can look in the mirror and smile because of how happy with yourself you are. Do it so that you can be the BEST version of yourself. 

I constantly reminded myself that I am amazing. Y'all, when I say that it breaks my heart when I get messages from you guys saying that you don't think you're pretty enough, smart enough, whatever, I mean it. I can't tell you how many times I've been in tears over it. You guys don't realize that this twitter means more to me than randomly sending messages to my future husband. I want to inspire you - to give you hope. 

So what have I done in the past to remind myself how amazing I am? I would leave myself little notes. I have written on my mirror "You're beautiful" or bible verses such as "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, and I know that full well. - Psalm 139:14." When I see these, I am constantly reminded that I need to stay positive. I can tell you what I have done but at the end of the day, it's ultimately a mindset that you are going to have to put yourself in. It's so hard. My gosh, it's so hard but trust me... When you get to a point when you can look at yourself and say "I'm happy and proud to be me because I am fabulous #hairflip," it's the best feeling in the world. 

I realized that God loves me and forgot about everyone else. This is the MOST important thing EVER. The only one who can judge you is God. He made you. He LOVES you. Stop comparing yourself to every other girl out there. They don't matter. God matters. 

I'm ending this with this incredible music video. Turn your speakers up and jam out! 

Love always, M 

P.S. I love y'all. Thank you for inspiring me.You guys help me to be the best version of myself that I can be. 

Wedding Wednesday: @HowHeAsked

Hey y'all. I hope everyone's having an amazingggg week. So this blog post is a little different! It's more of a feature blog. Before y'all go on a rant about how I'm being paid to do this and so on and so forth, I'm really not. This is all me. I just found a website that I really, really like and want everyone to be as obsessed with it as I am!! 




If you couldn't already tell, I am a hopeless romantic through and through. I am absolutely in love with watching wedding and proposal videos so naturally when I found @HowHeAsked, I immediately became obsessed. This website will seriously make you laugh, make you cry, make you happy, make you hopeful, and make you believe in love. This is a website where you can submit your own proposal. They'll blog it for you, and then you can send it to all of your friends and family. If you think I'm doing this IMMEDIATELY, you're thinking right. 

The founder of HowHeAsked.com, Stacy Tasman,  is so awesome. The reason that I love this website so much is because she wants others to see that true love really does exist. 

"I started HowHeAsked in Fall 2011 after a dear friend of mine got engaged. I felt blessed to be a part of the proposal and honestly couldn’t tell you who was more swept up in the emotion – my newly engaged girlfriend or my [extremely mushy] self. Alas, HowHeAsked.com began.

I’m a storyteller myself and unstoppably inquisitive. I love all things real, passionate, and energetic, and when life gives me lemons – I build a lemonade stand. I live in New York City, am a University of Florida graduate, and I’m lucky to have traveled through some of the world’s most beautiful countries over the past few years.

Most importantly, I get to know extremely excited women and help them share the most amazing story of their life with their friends, family, and all the love-addicted readers of HowHeAsked. And yes, I cry reading every single one."

Anyways... I've literally spent HOURS on this website but here are a two of my favorites!!! 

The Ultimate Disney Proposal 

A Proposal Across the World 

Hahaha, it just took me over an hour to write this because I kept stopping to watch more videos. Anyways... I hope you love this website as much as I do!! They're relaunching their website in a week because of high volume of submissions coming in but you can still view the posts. 

Love, M. 

p.s. YOU'RE WELCOME. I KNOW. IT'S AMAZING. 

Standards

Alright so after asking y'all what you wanted to read tonight, you decided that you would rather hear about having standards than how I knew I was in love. (Don't fret, I'll write that blog post later)

I cannot stress how important it is for you to have standards for you want in your future husband and how you should never settle. You need to realize what is important to you and realize that if the guy that you like does not meet these requirements, he might not be the one for you. I understand that it is hard to get over someone but think about it this way... If he does not meet all of your requirements, are you sure that you would want to spend the rest of your life with a man like that? Figure out what you want in a man and don't settle for any less. If that means that you need to end things with a guy, do it. Why are you investing your heart and emotions into a man who you know you will not marry? I don't know about you but I don't have the emotional capacity to set myself up for heart break and disappointment. 

My requirements:
1. Loves God
2. Faithful and Loving
3. Will be a good father to my future babies
4. Driven because he knows that he will one day have a family to help support
5. Gets along with my family

Can you list your top 5? If not, you should really think about that as you are getting ready to fall asleep for the night. You need to know what you are looking for in a future husband before you begin your search.



Now that we've talked about actually having standards, we need to talk about the difference of having having high standards and having high standards that are just not realistic and reasonable. You never know who you will fall in love with so have those 4-5 non-negotiables but then go into every potential relationship with an open mind. I always thought that I would marry a man who was 6' or taller but my man is only 5'10 or 5'11. I always thought I would marry a country boy but here I am dating a city boy. I thought I would never date a man who was older than my big brother but my man is is a year older than him. Wesley is not exactly who I thought that I would end up with but now that I am with him, I would not want to be with any other man. He is absolutely perfect for me in every way possible.

Y'all, I just want to remind you that just because you may have not found your prince charming yet, it doesn't mean that you will never meet him. Never lose faith that you will find your perfect man. He's out there. God will send him to you when He thinks that you both are ready.

Take delight in the LORD, 

and He will give you the desires of your heart.

- Psalm 37:4

Love, M 

P.S. When I was on Memento's blog today when I was at work, I fell even more in love with this company. I teared up when I read this amazing post. I will definitely be giving back. Click here to learn how you can, too. 

How Much?

Let me ask you a question. How much are you willing to put up with before you have to make the conscious decision to break up with your significant other?

If you didn't know, we get e-mails and Kik messages requesting advice about people's love lives. Here recently, we've gotten a lot about how girls feel like their guy doesn't put in effort or if they should wait on a guy. I wanted to write a blog to respond in case there are others out there who are in the same position. This blog isn't going to necessary be a happy blog about how you'll find the perfect guy. Actually I'm hoping that, for some of you, it will be a reality check.

Everyone knows that relationships are hard work. There is no such thing as a "perfect relationship." Everyone has been in the position where they think that the relationship has become one sided. They feel as though one person is putting in more effort than the other or the relationship is not going anywhere. First and foremost, I think that no relationship ending decision should be made without a serious conversation. If the problem can be fixed, I think that you should definitely give it a shot. There are plenty of couples that slip into a rut after dating for a long time. Just because you're in a rut, it does not mean that the relationship is over. Sit down, talk, and try to work it out. If you're going to try to work on bettering your relationship, you have to give it 150% effort and be extremely patient. It's not going to be fixed overnight. 

Let's say that you've had "the talk" multiple times and it seems as though nothing has changed. This is when you should think about whether or not this is a relationship that you should continue. I want to go ahead and say that just because you end a relationship does not mean that you're the bad guy. Sometimes you just need to look out for what is best for you. You should not find yourself more unhappy than you do happy. The point of being in a relationship with someone is to find someone who makes you happy and makes you want to be a better person. On a different note, this may be the shock that he needs to give him a reality check that he may possible really lose you if he doesn't fight for you. If he doesn't fight for you, he's not the one for you.

Breaking up with someone is always scary. Most commonly, you're scared that you will never find another guy who will accept you or love you. I know this is easier said than done but you really have to push through it and not let that affect you because, ultimately, that's just not true. As much as you think that you'll be single forever, I promise that you won't be. You can't let the fear of being alone scare you into staying apart of something that makes you unhappy. 

Ultimately, I hope that this blog gives some of you ladies courage to end the relationship that continues to bring you pain and heartbreak. Yes, breaking up with someone sucks. It hurts, you'll cry, but in the end, you're doing what is best for you. It's okay to be selfish. This is one point in your life when you SHOULD be selfish. If you feel like it's worth fighting for, go for it. But if he doesn't fight right along with you to keep the relationship , it's not going to get any better. So at this point, I think you should get off the computer, phone, iPad, whatever and go take a bubble bath. Think about your relationship, which direction it's going in, and if it's truly something that you want to continue fighting for. Do what is best for you. Again, it's okay to be selfish sometimes. 

If you need to talk, e-mail us at tomyfuturehus@ymail.com. I get them straight to my phone and will do whatever I can to help you.

Love, M. 

P.S. Click Here and go listen to this song. It's by my sorority sister, Anna, and one of her friends. I'm obsessed. 

Disappointment.

I'm going to go ahead and start this by saying that we are all human. Our lives do not always go according to plan. Things happen or don't happen. Most of us preach to trust God and His timing but what happens when you pray for something and He doesn't send it your way? You get disappointed, right?

So maybe right now you really want that boy to notice you and finally make a move or maybe you are praying that your relationship will go back to how it was in the beginning when it was "perfect." Let's say it doesn't happen the way that you want it to...that boy doesn't notice you or you guys break up. The pain is real, right? It's there. I can't explain enough how many times that I've been disappointed that things don't go my way but recently I've had an epiphany. Don't you think that God is disappointed in us when we don't trust Him? In His timing? When we defy Him? Have you ever thought about that? I honestly haven't thought too much into it until the pastor of my church preached about it about two weeks ago. 

I've said over and over again that God always has your best interest in mind when creating the great plan that is your life. I mean it. He wants what's best for you regardless of what you may think. Don't get me wrong, I struggle with this soo much but ultimately I have to remember that no matter what plan my mind can think up, He always knows what's best. Instead of focusing on the fact that I am disappointed that the plan that I concocted and dreamed up in my head didn't go according to plan, I need to think "You know what, God? I trust You." Instead of focusing on what I want God to do for MY life, I need to think of how I can live for Him, to spread His word, and to show others how amazing His unconditional love is. 

Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. 

-Psalm 37:4

Love, M. 

Trust and loving again

Trust.

Webster's dictionary defines trust as
a: assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something
b: one in which confidence is placed.

I would like to talk about the second definition. One in which confidence is placed. I love that. Honestly, cheating and love affairs have become a norm in our generation. It breaks my heart. I've tweeted numerous times that if you can't be faithful then you don't deserve to be in a relationship. I, personally, have never cheated on anyone in my life. I have been cheated on twice and have once been the "other girl." (I had no idea so don't think I'm a hussy because I am far from.) If you know that you are being cheated on, have some respect for yourself and end it. You deserve so much more than that. You deserve someone who treats you like you're a treasure... because you are.

Okay, well that is just one thing I wanted to talk about. I feel like that stuff is pretty obvious. On another note, I wanted to talk about trusting a new guy with your heart. This is easily one of the top ten scariest things ever. EVER. But you've gotta do it. Stop letting what the guys in the past have done to you completely affect the potential happiness that the new guy could bring to your life. Okay, yeah...  It's most definitely easier said than done. It's actually nothing that I can help you do. I can't give you how-to-steps on how to open your heart again or how to love again, but I can tell you from personal experience that it's a mindset that you need to put yourself in. It's about trusting that God has the perfect guy out there for you and knowing that, unfortunately, not every relationship is going to work out. But you know what I think about when one doesn't? You were in that relationship to learn a lesson, each failed relationship puts you one step closer to the man God has waiting for you, and think about how much more you will appreciate your husband when you find him.

I promise you that, regardless of what you may think, not every guy is going to screw you over. Not every guy is out to break your heart or ruin you for the next one. Are there really crappy guys out there who only care about themselves? Most definitely yes but don't give up hope that there are still good guys out there. If you're like me, you consider yourself a pretty decent person. I strive to be the best person I can be, to help everyone that I can, and love with my whole heart. In my opinion if there is ONE person like that in the world, there HAS to be more. There just has to be. (I'm not trying to be cocky but I take pride in the fact that I strive to be a good person.) I have faith that God has touched other people like He has me and they also strive to be good people.

So basically, you're probably scared. It's alright to be but don't let that stop you from opening your heart and giving love a chance. You might get hurt but it's not the end the book. It's just the end of the chapter. Love is real. It's out there... and you will find it. I'm praying that each and everyone of you find it because you deserve it.

Love, M.

Don't forget that you can always e-mail us with anything you need to talk about, tomyfuturehus@ymail.com.

Learning to love

Soo.. I'm sure that if you have ever been in a relationship, you know that they are not easy. They take a lot of work. But if you find someone that you truly care about and love, you'll understand me when I say that it's all worth it. Since I'm not currently in a relationship right now, let me go back and establish my credibility. I have been dating since I was a teenager--13 to be exact. My longest relationship was three, almost four, years. Yes, I thought I was going to marry that boy. After him, I was I guess you could say... "fishing" for the right catch. I am currently getting to know a certain man and I'm liking the direction that it is going. But point being, trust me... I've had the flings and I've had the serious relationships. I don't know everything but I've learned my fair share.

BUT back to the subject at hand... the trials and tribulations of a relationship. If you claim you have the "perfect" relationship where you both get along great, never fight, and always understand each other, I'm calling B-S. That's not a real relationship. You're SUPPOSED to get on each other's nerves, push each other's buttons, and fight. That's how you learn about the other person's habits and characteristics. You'll learn what he or she does or does not like. Everything is not supposed to be easy. Let me repeat: Everything is not supposed to be easy. 

In order to really get far in your relationship, you're going to need to be patient, understanding, and able to communicated. I said this in my previous blog but it's so true. If y'all are arguing for some reason, try not to get too worked up too quick. I've learned that boys are not the smartest ones when it comes to girls and our emotions. They truly don't understand sometimes. What you need to do is take a deep breath and TRY to get them to understand you but you also have to listen when you want to talk. I've been in various positions where I've just yelled at my ex and it would always end tragically. I didn't understand why he didn't comprehend why I was upset. I thought after years of dating, he should just get me. Also, you can't be scared of telling him how you feel. If he says something that bothers you or hurts your feelings, tell him. If he cares about you, he'll feel sorry and apologize. If you keep that stuff bottled up, there is going to be tension which will lead to fights. He has to learn about you. He has to learn where you stand, which buttons to push, etc. Help him learn. 


Love is a constant battle. First, you have to fight to get that person. After that, you have to fight to keep that person. But throughout this whole thing, y'all might do things that drive each other crazy. But the cool thing is that you'll learn how he really feels about you and if y'all are meant to be or not. A man who truly loves you will do anything to make you happy and you'll do the same. You'll realize that if you truly care about each other then even on the hardest of days you'll refuse to walk away. You'll one day find a guy who can push your buttons, drive you crazy, and make you want to scream but you couldn't imagine living a single day without him by your side. 

Love, M. 

The "During"--Part one

It's been over a month since I've written but my life has been extremely hectic. It's been a very demanding time for Greek life at my school.


I've written a lot about what comes before and after a relationship, but I've realized that I haven't really talked about what to do during the relationship to keep it strong. When I was trying to figure out what I personally do to keep a relationship strong, I could only think of four things. I called H and asked her what she does but she was on the same page. After asking @GreekGent and @TW_Husband, I confirmed the four that I already had and added two that I didn't even think of but think is extremely important. 

Anyways... Here are my Top 3: 
(I have 3 more but I'm going to put that in a different post since these are kind of long and you'll probably get bored... You're welcome.)


1. Be Godly and faithful

I am a firm believer that God needs to have a strong presence in any relationship. My strongest relationships were those that were based around our faith where we were able to talk openly about our beliefs. It's important to remember that God is who brought you two together and He is the one who will help keep you together. I date to marry, and I fully intend on having a very Godly marriage so it's great to go ahead and build that foundation during the dating process. This should be completely obvious but while you're together, be faithful. Cheating is not and will never be okay. All I'm going to say is that if you can't be faithful, you probably shouldn't be in a relationship. 


2. Be patient and understanding and communicate

I, personally, used to think that a guy should automatically know what he did to hurt me. Mistake number one. I'll pull the whole one worded response thing until he asks me what's wrong then I will get upset when  he doesn't realize what he's done wrong. Mistake number two. Over the years and my various relationships, I've learned how clueless guys can be sometimes. They truly don't even realize what they're doing half the time. You have to explain it to them then be patient enough to do it again if they don't understand. If you constantly get worked up, tension is going to build and eventually break your relationship. Yes, I will probably always fall back into my "one worded ways" but I am so much better at making sure my significant other understands my point of view when I am upset. If you feel yourself getting worked up, take a deep breath and try again. This is one of those times where you cannot let your stubbornness get the best of you. You're reading the blog post of a girl who is exactly like her father--as stubborn as can be. But is your pride worth more to you than the love of your life? I would hope not. 


3. A-P-P-R-E-C-I-A-T-E

Y'all, simple gestures are taken for granted so easily. After a while, it's easy to expect him to pay for dinner or open every door for you. Just keep in mind that he doesn't have to do those things but he does them because he loves you. He likes seeing the smile on your face and knowing that he's the reason why it's there. Do little things to show that you really are thankful what he does for you. It can be as simple as making sure you always say thank you, but you can also show it by cooking him dinner, baking him his favorite treat, or sending him a cute text in the middle of the day. Trust me, making him feel appreciated will keep him happy and we want our men to be happy, right? Right. I don't know about you but I love knowing that I'm the reason why my guy smiling. 

Alright, this is the first part of this segment. The rest will be posted later this week! I didn't want to give y'all a HUGE blog because I honestly never read the entire thing when it's super long and I don't expect for y'all to! I promise to get better at keeping the blogs on a regular schedule... after finals. College finals are ROUGH. 

If you haven't followed @GreekGent and @TW_husband, please do. I go to them for a guy's perspective on relationships and they always give me amazing advice. They're actually my really good guy friends. I can truly say that they are both the epitome of true gentlemen--the last few of a dying breed. 

Love, M.

P.S. Don't forget to do more than just tweet #PrayForBoston and actually take the time to pray for those affected. 

Don't be THAT girl

If y'all didn't know, I went on a cruise for spring break. First and foremost, best idea ever. It was so much fun! You should definitely go on one.

While we were on the cruise, my friends and I decided that we wanted to go by different aliases. We had Layla, Libby, Nadia, and Karen. It was actually kind of fun. When we got back from the cruise, I thought about how we changed our names but not where we were from, majors, etc. We all pretty much remained the same. I thought of other girls I had seen on the cruise and wondered if anyone else decided to change their identities, too. Then I thought about how girls change themselves all the time to get the attention of a boy. I remember seeing girls trying SO hard to get other guys' attentions. I saw girls dumbing themselves down to act "cute." How do I know this? I remember having conversations with girls then seeing them turn and talk to guys. They were so incredibly intelligent when talking to me then when they talked to the guys they would pull the "wait...what?" card. That was my cue to bless a heart and walk away.

There are so many stereotypes and standards of how girls and guys should act. It's actually quite obnoxious when I think about it but you should not have to change yourself to impress a guy. If you're like me, you date to marry. This guy is going to learn the real you eventually. You may as well show him who you are and what you're all about before you waste both his and your time. If you're sarcastic, be sarcastic. If you're sassy, be sassy. If you're funny, be funny. The guy that you're supposed to be with is going to love you for everything that you are. You want him to love you, right? The real you? So be the real you. Show him what you have to offer. If you're independent, don't try to change yourself because that is what a woman "should do." Go on with your bad self, girl. You should always strive to be the best person you can be but you shouldn't have change yourself to make a guy like/love you. If you do, he's not falling in love with you. He's falling in love with the person that he THINKS you are, and you can't keep that up forever. I'm sure that would get exhausting.

So ultimately, my message is: embrace you, love you, just be you. You'll find the boy who loves you for everything that you are despite your quirks. You're amazing and wonderful and it's only a matter of time before God sends someone your way who will appreciate you and treat you like the princess that you are.

Love, M.

Alone but not lonely

Okay, so I just sat here for approximately ten minutes staring at the computer screen trying to figure out how I was going to write this, which direction I was going to go, what message I wanted to send.

If you read the blog titled "The Battle Before the Victory" or something like that, you saw that I recently ended things with my guy. This week has been a test for me. I'm learning how to stand on my own all over again. In one of my previous blogs, I talked about letting a man contribute to my happiness but not determining it. H, also, tweeted a long time ago "I was raised to never depend on a man but to instead find a man and learn to share your life with him." Well y'all, home girl is on POINT.  I'm not going to let the fact that I didn't get a good morning text determine the course of my day. I don't need a good morning text to be happy. The fact that I didn't have a valentine this year? That's perfectly okay. Every girl loves hearing that she is beautiful. Well you know what? The bible tells you that you are. Every girl loves hearing that she is loved. The bible tells you that, too. I am already unconditionally loved by the most amazing man ever--God.

In society today being single has such a negative connotation but is it really? In my opinion, no. It means that you have high enough standards to not settle. It means that you love yourself enough to not stay in an unhealthy relationship. It means that you know your worth. Sometimes we have to remember that being single does not mean we are weak. It means that we are strong enough to stand on our own. It means that you trust in God enough to remain alone until He sends you a man worthy of your love. You are placing your heart in His hands and trusting that He will place it into the hands of a man who deserves it. (LOVE that quote.)

So what if you're single? Live it up! We get so caught up in having someone to spend time with, someone to cuddle with, someone to shower us with affection--and I admit those things sound and are nice--but really, what is life if you are not your own person? When you marry someone, do you lose your entire identity? I will give 500% effort in my marriage, but at the same time... I want to remain my own person. I want to share my friends with him and befriend his friends, but I do not need to go out with him every time he wants to go spend time with his boys. If I am going to brunch with the ladies--as much as I will love spending time with him-- I want to be able to just have that time with my girls. Space is a beautiful thing. It helps keep you sane. 

Remember... being single is not a bad thing. You already have the most important unconditional love--God's. As Kevin Hart says, "Do you, boo boo." Have fun. Use it as motivation to better yourself. Work on your relationship with God. There are so many more aspects to life. Just remember to stay classy and always strive to be a Proverbs 31 wife because one day God will send you the man He has waiting for you. 

Love, m. 

Dear Future Husband

Dear Future Husband,

I can't wait to grow old with you. I want to make you feel handsome even when you're old and gray. I want to make you breakfast on Saturday mornings before we go to our 11 o'clock tee time then praise God with you the very next morning. I want to spoil you, encourage you, and love you. I want to be there beside you as you're fulfilling your dreams-- encouraging you every step of the way. I want to make you laugh when you're having a bad day. I want to make you fall in love with me every single day. It's not always about what you can do for me but also what I can do for you. In my opinion, that's love. It's when you stop being selfish and begin being selfless.

I've always been skeptical, but I've never lost faith that God will eventually send you my way. I've had a plan set out in my head for years but one thing that I've learned is that God always has a different plan... one with a better result than mine could ever have.

Maybe I've already met you, maybe I haven't. All I know is that one day I'm going to realize that I have fallen madly in love with you. I'm sure I'll be terrified and excited all at the same time. But you know what? I can't wait. 

Love your future wife, M.


---this letter was taken from a personal tumblr blog that I have but they ARE my words.

The battle before the victory.

Before y'all read this, just know that this isn't a typical blog post. It's kind of an update.




Well y'all, I ended things with my guy tonight. After a lot of thinking, contemplating, and praying, I've decided that I desire more. Y'all are probably wondering why or what happened. Honestly, nothing really happened... but that was kind of the problem.  I can't keep being put on the back burner. I can't keep putting up with making him a priority and not being one of his. I deserve more than that, and I have no doubt in my mind that I do. It hurts that it had to come to this, but it did. It'd be different if it was like H's long distance relationship where they get to see each other occasionally. But if I'm going months when he's just an hour and a half away? No. I am actually extremely understanding about being him being busy but it'd be nice if he would make me feel important. I hold a high leadership position within my sorority while also balancing demanding classes but I still make time for him. I know my worth. I know what I deserve... and it was more than he had to offer me right now.

But I'm not letting this bring me down. I know that God has an amazing guy out there for me. I will continue to pray for him and pray that he's doing the same for me. I will continue to search for him and pray that he's searching for me. I will continue to prepare myself to be a Proverbs 31 wife. Y'all, I know that I will one day make such an amazing wife and mother because my Momma and the Bible taught me how. I will not let this make me cynical when it comes to love.

Right now, I need to learn how to stand on my own. After getting out of my last relationship, I kind of rushed into whatever this was. I need to focus on me, my faith, and my life. I have always been the kind of girl who has said that she has never needed a man to make her happy. But honestly, I haven't been practicing what I've been preaching. I want a guy to contribute to my happiness not determine it. Maybe as I'm working on myself, I'll meet a new guy... but until then I'll just keep praying for the one that God has waiting for me. And who knows? Maybe this kid will realize that I do deserve more and that he wants to give me that. Maybe he'll fight for me. Maybe one day we'll end up together. Maybe it's just not our time right now but I know that God has a plan for both of us. This is just another battle before the victory.

Anyways, I'll keep y'all posted. I hope everyone has an amazing week.


-M.

The Time Crunch

Y'all, let me tell you that I am an ambitious planner. I always have been ever since I was a little girl. Not only would I dream big but I would strategically plan every little detail to a T in order to reach my goal. I always knew what I wanted... Or so I thought. I want y'all to take a guess at how many times things went my way exactly according to my hypothetical plans. That's right... NONE. Shocker, right? 

Over the years, one of things that I have learned is it doesn't matter what I have planned. It doesn't matter what I want to happen or what result I am dreaming up, God probably has something different in mind. Guess how many times I've been disappointed with the result? None. If I'm not happy, it's not the end. 

What does this have to do with my love life or yours? Everything. As I grow older with each passing year, I swear the pressure to get married grows more and more intense. Everyone around me seems to be getting engaged or married. I mean goodness, every time I get on Facebook it's another announcement. Don't get me wrong, I am so ecstatic for each and every person but I'm going to be graduating college in a year. I always thought that I would be engaged by the time I was a senior. 

But you know what? I've learned that I need to slow my roll. I realized that I can plan all I want but if its not aligned with God's plan, it's probably not what's best for me in the long haul. I might know what I want, but He knows what I need. He will always have my best interest in mind. I need to trust in His timing because its perfect. 

So what if everyone is getting engaged, married, or having kids? It's their time. Just because it's not yours does not mean it's never going to be. If your like me and your family constantly asks when they're going to be hearing those wedding bells, just tell them that God doesn't think it's your time yet and that it's perfectly okay that it's not. Let me repeat that... it is perfectly okay that it's not. 

Yes, you may feel the pressure of the "time crunch" to get married but the best things come to those who wait. Also... Keep in mind that the longer you wait, the more you tend to appreciate something. The right guy will come when God thinks you both are ready. He will think you are beautiful even when you have no make up on, and you will think he's still handsome when he is old and gray. You'll annoy him when you make him wait, and he'll annoy you when he complains about it. You'll have your very own fairy tale... one written by the best author of all, God. It's going to be totally worth it. 

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

Love, M.

E-mail me comments, questions, anything. I love talking to y'all. 
Contact info in the "Contact Us" section of the blog! 

A Different Perspective

I've literally been sitting here staring at this page wondering how to start this, and as you can tell obviously this is the best I could come up with. I'm not particularly good at this, I don't write, especially not blogs. M is usually the one who does all of the blogposts, but for some reason I just felt as if I needed to write this. I'm hoping that y'all aren't too harsh, and too critical. Everything we write to y'all about our lives is true and we take a huge risk posting this. So, here goes nothing. 

This post is going to seem very similar to the one that M just posted, but I felt that another perspective should be given. 

I'm a junior in college. I don't go to a very large school, in fact it's a private school that doesn't even offer Greek life. Seeing that we don't have Greek life, majority of our campus is run by athletes, in fact that's the reason I chose this school, but that's a different story. Since we don't have Greek life here, we party a little differently. The school is located close to a rather large SEC school, so many of weekends are spent downtown at the bars. M was very open about her past so I might as well be too. My freshman and some of my sophomore year were a hot mess to say the least. And now as I look back, a good majority I don't remember. Until one day my mother found out about what I was doing. It shattered our relationship and took a very long time to repair. I didn't realize how my actions looked to others. Actually I didn't realize how it looked until very recently. Judgement is something we face everyday, it's inevitable. And as much as we say that we shouldn't care what people think about us, others opinions are important. It's also inevitable. 

My roommate is a senior basketball player, and a very active partier. Now here's the part where you need a little background information about me; I'm a pushover. I can't say no, and people walk all over me all the time. It's something I know about myself, and something I try to work on but it's hard. So this last semester I spent a lot of time downtown at the bars, with all the people and all the alcohol. Did I occasionally have a drink? Yes. Did I flirt with the cute guy standing at the bar? Yes. But I also got to see the way the guy looked at me, and the way he spoke to me, and the way he implied things that were never in a million years going to happen. I'm not that girl, and you're not that lucky. But I learned a lot about myself from being in those bars and seeing how guys interacted with me. What I also learned is what it is like to witness those girls who don't remember the night from the other side. 

M wrote last week about being the person he would want. Don't just uphold standards for your future husband, but also uphold standards for yourself and what your future husband needs. I feel like I'm just rambling so now here's what I wanted to write about. Sit down and look at how others view you. Those guys were flirting with me in the bar hoping that I would be too drunk to notice what was happening, and end up going home with them. They think this way because of people like my roommate, and a few of my friends. 

Monday I was sitting in class when a classmate of mine came in and proceeded to tell me about her weekend. Friday night at a party she was "on a whole other level". She ended up making out with 4 guys just while she was at the party, one of which she still doesn't know his name. And at the end of the night she ended up going back with a guy who is her lab partner in physics. They hooked up, and the next day when she woke up she couldn't get out fast enough. They hadn't seen each other again until yesterday when she had lab and I'm not sure how that went. All I could think about during this conversation was wow. Just wow. One day you have to tell your husband about the night in college that you ended up making out with 4 guys and going home with another. Granted in today's society he will probably be telling you about his wild nights too, but that's beside the point. I know personally that I don't want all of those stories to have to be told by me. My roommate goes downtown basically every weekend and its a different story every time she comes back, and she wonders why people text her all the time about the stuff they've heard about her, or why she can't find a guy to date and have one relationship.

These girls go around bragging about this. In fact the classmate said one of her guy friends gave her a high five after hearing about her night. College is the best four years of your life, but it can also later in life be the four years you regret for the decisions you made. I've already started to regret some of them. It's possible to go out in college and enjoy yourself and have a ton of fun, and not have to worry about the way that people view you. 

 I'm not saying that every now and then I don't have a drink, or that I don't go out. Because I do. But I would much rather stay at home with boyf having some wine and watching a movie and cuddling. People talk, people judge. It's a part of life. All I'm trying to say is do you want to be that girl that everyone talks about being the school sloot, or do you want to be a woman who can hold her head high and be proud of the choices she makes.

Love H

Also, please don't judge me for how terribly written this is! I'm a chemistry major, not a writer. :)

Would you marry you?

Disclaimer: this is a really sensitive subject for some people. This could get really sticky, but I'm writing it anyways. If I offend you, I'm truly sorry and I did not write this with that intention. I'm actually being really honest with you guys in this, so don't judge my past choices and who I was. Enjoy.



If you're like me, you have a list of qualities that you would want in your future husband. You probably want him to be Godly, faithful, loving, with the qualities to be a great father. You're constantly thinking about what HE has to offer YOU, but have you ever thought about what YOU have to offer him? I used to get so caught up in making sure that I was keeping my standards high that I wouldn't think about if I would meet the standards of a man whom I would want to marry.

Let's back track... If you didn't already know, I'm in college. I'll tell y'all the truth. My freshman and the first semester of my sophomore year, I was a little bit of a wild child. I thought that it was adorable to get super drunk and kiss random boys that I have never met. I had a "I don't care" mentality--especially after a big break up with my ex boyfriend of three years. I remember my Facebook picture once was of me "slapping the bag." Classy, I know. Wow... I'm so embarrassed.

Yes, I still go out. Yes, I do have a drink or two when I do go out.  But now will you ever see me sloppy drunk, unable to stand, passed out on the stairs? Absolutely not. Do I find it necessary to make out with guys when I am intoxicated now? No. That's just NOT cute. I've always been a firm believer in the saying "class attracts class." I wasn't making the best decisions before. But I want a man who will be able to handle himself in various situations--alcohol involved or not--and a man who is able to do that is probably not looking for a girl who is passed out in the backseat of her best friend's car. Everyone has a past. Everyone has made bad decisions that they might wish that they could take back. Lord, knows I do.

I was so caught up in having fun and living the single life that I wasn't thinking about the future. I thought that if I acted a certain way, guys would be attracted to me. Guess what? They were... but not in the good way. Don't get me wrong, I was never one to "go home" with a guy, but they would only want me in the moment. I wasn't "relationship" material... I just didn't know it. I thought I was doing what guys wanted... or at least the guys that I was attracted to at the time. (The party boy.) 

I've reached the point in my life where I want to marry the boy that I am dating. Now I've realized the importance of being a woman worth marrying--a future Proverbs 31 wife. If you want to marry a man who loves God, you have to be a woman so lost in God that he has to go through Him in order to get to you. (One of my favorite quotes) Read your bible more, go to church, pray. A man worth marrying will never go after a girl already in a relationship, you shouldn't go after a man who is already in one. Realistically, I'm probably not going to be my future husband's first. Honestly, he wouldn't be mine. But I don't want a man who has slept around with a ton of girls, so I don't sleep around. At all. I try to match everything that I would want in a future husband. 

After I realized that I wouldn't have married the girl that I was, I changed. I transformed myself into a classy, young lady who now has an amazing guy in her life. I couldn't be happier. I was never perfect, and I'm still far from, but I knew the way I was living was not marriage material... and no break up should have caused me to do that.

I could go on for hours and hours about this, but ultimately it comes down to a simple question. Would you marry you? Imagine your PERFECT man. Would you be a woman that he would want to marry? If you have high standards like I do, you probably want a man who has high standards also. Would you meet those?

Think about it. Think about where you are in life and ask yourself... Would you marry you? If you want your true gentleman, make sure you're being a classy lady. 

Love, M.

Note:  Please don't judge who I was. I am thoroughly embarrassed but figured that complete honesty was the way to go. I hope y'all liked it. Comment if you'd like or e-mail us. (Our e-mail address is in the "Contact Us" section of the blog) I'd love to hear what you have to say... unless it's something nasty then you can just keep those mean comments to yourself. 

Letting go

In my previous blog, I talk about how you never get over someone that you truly love. I am such a firm believer in this. I honestly don't think that you can. At least for me, once someone is in my heart, they stay there forever. You simply learn to move on and live without them.

If I had to count, I'd say I had about three serious relationships in my entire life. Ranging from one to three years. If you asked me right now if I loved them, I'd probably tell you yes. Would I date them again? Absolutely not. Do I wish anything negative upon them? Most definitely not. They helped shape me into the young woman that I am today, and I adore them for that. From every guy that I've dated or "talked" to, I've learned something new about myself and what I want in a relationship. Letting go is never easy... not if you truly loved someone. How do you let go of someone?

In my book, step one would be knowing your worth.Go look up Psalm 139:14. When my last boyfriend broke up with me, I would think "I am more beautiful than Cinderella. I smell like pine needles and have a face like sunshine." (If you don't know that quote then I need you to stop reading and go watch Bridesmaids right now. I'm not kidding. Go.)  Instead of thinking, "I'm so sad that I lost him," think "it's totally his lost because I am the BOMB DOT COM." Be confident in yourself. Know that you're a good person with a kind heart. Know that you are beautiful, inside and out. Know that God made you perfect. You. Are. Perfect.

Were you cheated on? I've been there. Multiple times. If you dwell in thinking that you're worthless and constantly questioning what other girls have that you don't have, you'll never be happy.  Instead of thinking what THEY have, think about what YOU have. Know your worth, ladies. It's hard. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with but with lots of praying, I've reached a point where I understand what I have to offer someone and it's made my life ten times better.

Step Two: 
Be positive about the future. It's easy to focus on the boys that broke your heart, but like I tweet all the time, try focusing on how exciting it's going to be when God finally sends someone your way who will give you his all. If you continue to stay in a negative state of mind, you won't be able to open your heart and accept new love. Life is all about experiences, some negative others positive. Don't dwell on the things that hurt you. Look at it this way, if you didn't get hurt every once in a while would you be the strong person that you are today? Take it as a life lesson learned and move on. Definitely easier said than done but not impossible. Pray. When the weight of the world gets too heavy, get down on your knees and pray.


Times like this it is easy to question God. I know that whenever I would get broken up with, I would ask God why this was happening. That's just me being real. Back to the bible verse that I wrote about in the last blog post, Jeremiah 29:11. Whatever is happening is happening for a reason. You might no understand it, but you don't really have to. God's got it. He knows the endings and will lead you to it. Remember, every broken heart is putting you one step closer to the one that God has waiting for you.


Step Three: 
Stay busy. Stay open. After every break up, even when I've been the one to break up with boys, sometimes all I want to do is lay in my bed and cry. Luckily, I have been blessed with amazing friends and sorority sisters who will not let me do dwell for too long. They give me a few days to myself but then force me to not stay at my apartment by myself. If you haven't already, go follow @A_Southern_Lady on twitter. She was the best support system I could have asked for with my last break up with a boy named Nick. When she would either see tweets about me doing nothing or I would tell her I'm doing nothing, she would give me different things to go do. She would tell me to go shopping or to go out to eat or anything. After a while, I realized this is just what I HAVE to do. When Prince William and Kate Middleton broke up, she only gave herself a little while to dwell. She pretty quickly began going out and having fun. This was the best way to show him that she was fine without him. You know what happened after? He wanted her back and now they're going to have the prettiest baby ever. But maybe you'll do the same and he won't want you back. That's okay because the more you're out of your house, apartment, etc. the more opportunity you'll have to meet new boys. If a boy is interested in you, give him a chance. I'm not talking about a day or week after your break up... definitely give yourself time to dwell. But if a cute guy who seems genuinely nice asks for for your number then give it to him. If you don't find him interesting after a little bit then onto the next one.

Keep your mind, options, and heart open. Stay positive. And above all, pray and trust God. You're beautiful, wonderful, and perfect. It's only a matter of time before a guy comes along who realizes all of that and will cherish you for everything that you are. 

Love, M.
Thanks for reading this! Once again, this is JUST for me. It's not everything I do to let go of a guy just the three main things that I do. Feel free to leave a comment about one of your steps. I'd love to hear it! 

The Chase

So.. I remember tweeting something along the lines of "#CallMeOldFashioned because I believe in a boy courting a girl" and being snapped at by some boy. I couldn't help but go to his profile to see if he was in relationship. After about 10 minutes of stalking, I realized that he was single. I honestly couldn't help but think "that's probably why." Courtship is so important in my book. A boy has to earn my love.

I am a firm believer that a boy needs to try really hard to win me so that he'll appreciate me when he gets me. My heart is a fragile thing. It's been broken, beaten, and battered. It needs to be handled with care, and if you think I'm going to give it to anyone to mess with... you're thinking again. Before I let him in, I need to make sure that he's here to stay and will take care of it. He needs to prove to me that he deserves it. Now don't get me wrong, I've never been one for games. If I'm into you, you'll know, but there are little things that I need to do in order to protect myself. 

When talking to my little (little sorority sister), I always tell her "Prince Charming chased Cinderella, not the other way around." Girls do not need to be the one who is doing the chasing. How do I  make boys chase me? It can be as simple as letting him text ME first. It may not be that I don't want to talk to him, I very well could and probably do, but he doesn't necessarily need to know this right off the bat. When I am texting him AFTER he's texted me, I throw in a few winky's or sly comments to let him know that I'm interested. I'm so glad that I have an iPhone because it just seems so much easier to flirt with emoji's. Texting is annoying in general, but it's how we work in the 21st century. If he doesn't text me, well he's just not interested. Yeah, it sucks but that's just the truth. A guy who is interested will put in the effort. After I've let him text me first for a couple of days, I text him first. I want to put myself out there and show him that I do think about him sometimes and that I actually do want to talk to him.  it's right back to letting him text me first. 

Now onto dates. I cannot exaggerate enough how much I dislike the term "hanging out" when it comes to love or romance. Hanging out is NOT a date, it's two people casually spending time with each other. A first date should be out at a neutral place, more than likely a restaurant, and HE should be the one to initiate it. A guy needs to ask me to dinner or whatever. I mean I'm super old fashioned so little efforts like picking me up goes a long way because most guys don't do that anymore. I honestly don't mind meeting a guy somewhere for dinner but as awful as it sounds I do expect him to pay. If I'm paying for my part of the meal, I'm not on a date. That's just how it is for me. If it works out, I don't mind taking my guy on dates as a nice gesture. But at first, at least in my book, he should be the one paying. 

The chase shows me who truly is interested in me. There are times where I have given my number to boys and they talk to me for a couple of days then stop all of a sudden. Well, that's their loss because I'm a catch. I plan on marrying a man who will strive each day to show me that he cares about me and who will put in the effort every single day. He's going to have to prove to me that he'll be able to do that during our marriage while we're dating. I mean, I'll be doing the same thing. Once I find the guy that I'm supposed to marry, I'll be spending every single day proving to him that I'm the girl that God has been preparing for him. 

ANYWAYS... Ultimately, I think that the chase is the first show of if a guy is truly interested and will put in the effort to win you over. If he wants it, he'll work for it. Once he's worked for it, he should work to keep it. It's a never ending thing. 

Love, M.

AGAIN... I am not trying to step on anyone's toes. I'm not trying to tell you this is how you should run your love life. If you think otherwise, I respect that. This is just my views, and it's worked for me so far. I'm sure yours has worked for you!